my sexuality is tattoos and whether or not you can choke someone out with your thighs
LAYER ONE: THE OUTSIDE
- Name: jay (jaybs, jaybird, janaynay, etc)
- Eye Color: brown
- Hair Style/Color: brown/ginger
- Height: 5’9, 5’10
- Clothing style: i wear almost everything a size too big. will mostly be found in jeans and a t-shirt or plaid. so much plaid.
- Best physical feature: ??? (harri says skin)
LAYER TWO: THE INSIDE
- Your fears: spiders
- Your guilty pleasure: ??? i don’t get feeling guilty for the things i like
- Ambitions for the future: publish a novel, travel the world
LAYER THREE: THOUGHTS
- Your first thoughts waking up: jesus fucking christ why am i conscious
- What you think about most: fuck, idk. food, writing, mma. toss up between the three
- What you think about before bed: jesus fucking christ why am i conscious
- You think your best quality is: ??? (harri says poise)
LAYER FOUR: WHAT’S BETTER?
- Single or group dates: dates are a panic attack waiting to happen for me i choose neither
- To be loved or respected: feared
- Beauty or brains: beauty. i’m shallow, sue me.
- Dogs or cats: dogs. a) allergies, b) cats are evil incarnate
LAYER FIVE: DO YOU?
- Lie: all the fucking time, mostly to myself
- Believe in yourself: pfffff
- Believe in love: sure, why not
- Want someone: several someones. i don’t want to talk about it.
LAYER SIX: EVER?
- Been on stage: not if i can help it
- Done drugs: not anymore
- Changed who you were to fit in: guilty.
LAYER SEVEN: FAVORITES
- Favorite color: green
- Favorite animal: wolves, rhinos, horses, dogs
- Favorite movie: i don’t understand the question and won’t respond to it
- Favorite game: monopoly. laugh all you want, fuckers
LAYER EIGHT: AGE
- Day your next birthday will be: december 8
- How old will you be: 21
- Does age matter: yup. i wouldn’t date anyone younger than 18, and my upper threshold is probably about 25?
LAYER NINE: IN A BOY OR GIRL
- Best personality: i like guys who don’t take themselves too seriously. confident, self assured, but able to laugh at themselves
- Best eye color: green, but i like dark eyes also
- Best hair color: dark, but i’m not gonna throw someone out of bed if they’re blond, you know
- Best thing to do with a partner: cooking, fucking (like you weren’t all thinking it)
LAYER TEN: FINISH THE SENTENCE
- I love: my life right now
- I feel: happy
- I hide: a lot of my feelings
- I miss: my best friend(s)
- I wish: things were easier sometimes
but imagine just leaving one night and flying to jamaica or france or italy or australia or south korea or somewhere and not telling anyone where you are or where you’re going next (but making sure to call your mom at least once a week to let her know that you’re still alive and no you’re not coming home soon and no this isn’t about a boy it’s about you and how you need to not feel like the walls are closing in around you anymore) and sending postcards from all over to people who spent their whole lives wrapped like shackles around your ankles and not signing them but instead writing lines from hemingway novels or dickinson poems or maybe just writing “fuck you” and letting them wonder about the postmarks and wonder about you and hoping they feel sick to their stomach when they think about their mediocre lives and maybe you’ll end up changing your name and working in a flower ship on the coast of spain (even though high school spanish really, really didn’t prepare you for this) and you’ll go down to the beach every night and dig your hands into the sand and finally, finally feel like you can breathe.
did i hear someone say
sometimes i feel like my about me should contain actual information about me
the city // for when your soulmate is a city block glowing neon in the rain at 1am
feelings for something lost in two parts (part 2) | library tapes
this mess we’re in | pj harvey feat. thom yorke
midnight city (m83 cover) | the knocks
where in the world are you | great lake swimmers
come back from san francisco | the magnetic fields
rembihnútur | sigur rós
i was young when i left home | anthony feat. bryce dessner
city with no children | arcade fire
let’s get lost | beck and bats for lashes
set free | katie gray
thousands of lovers | editors
this is why we fight | the decemberists